When Feeling Blue Starts Shaping Tomorrow

This article was adapted from the InnerTalk newsletter,“What Are You Unknowingly Creating for Yourself?”

Feeling blue is part of being human. Sometimes there is a very good reason for it. If we are grieving, disappointed, frightened or dealing with something genuinely difficult, the answer isn't to paste a smile over our feelings and tell ourselves everything is wonderful.

I have often said that grief is simply the other side of love. If you had not loved as deeply, you probably wouldn't hurt as much when you lost someone. But would you really have preferred not to have loved in the first place?

Our so-called negative emotions can have something important to tell us. The concern is not that we occasionally feel blue. It is what can happen when the thoughts and expectations that accompany those feelings begin to become habitual.

When Today's Feelings Begin Affecting Tomorrow

When Eldon and I were researching Mind Training, I was fascinated by just how much research has been done on optimism, happiness and positive emotions.

One major review looked at studies involving more than 275,000 people. Happier people were more likely to have fulfilling marriages and relationships, higher incomes, better work performance, greater community involvement, better health and longer lives.

That doesn't mean happiness automatically produces those outcomes. Life is far more complicated than that. But it does raise an interesting question: What might optimistic people be doing differently?

If I believe a problem can be solved, I am more likely to keep looking for a solution. If I believe tomorrow might be better, I have more reason to do something today that could help make it better. And if I believe opportunities exist, I am more likely to look for them—and perhaps recognize one when it appears.

A different expectation about tomorrow can change what we do today. And what we do today can influence what happens tomorrow.

Changing the Direction,

Psychologists Barbara Fredrickson and Thomas Joiner used a term I particularly like: the upward spiral effect.

Their research suggests that positive emotions can broaden the way we think and help us build psychological resources that make it easier to cope with future challenges. A little more optimism may encourage us to try something. A small success can increase our confidence. That confidence may make us more willing to try the next thing. Nothing miraculous has to happen. Little by little, the direction can begin to change.

Unfortunately, the same kind of reinforcement can work against us. When we feel blue, we may turn down an invitation, stop doing something we normally enjoy or notice fewer of the little things that might otherwise give us pleasure. Our inner dialogue may become more pessimistic: What's the point? Nothing ever works out. Things probably won't get any better.

The more often we think this way, the more normal those thoughts can begin to feel. This is where the blues can become about more than today.

Why Overcoming the Blues Approaches the Problem From Several Directions

Overcoming the Blues was compiled around the recognition that feeling better isn't necessarily about changing one thing.

Stress may be part of the picture. So may unnecessary fears, loneliness or pessimistic expectations. We may have stopped noticing things that bring us pleasure or forgotten what it feels like to become genuinely enthusiastic about something. And sometimes what we ultimately want is simply a greater sense of peace and serenity.

That is why the collection brings together programs addressing different aspects of the emotional environment rather than focusing on a single quality.

The programs aren't designed to tell you that everything is wonderful when it isn't. They work with habitual self-talk that can reinforce stress, unnecessary fear, isolation, pessimistic expectations and discouragement, replacing it with more constructive self-talk supporting optimism, personal peace, connection, joy, enthusiasm and serenity.

The aim isn't forced happiness. It is helping to create an inner environment in which more positive thoughts and expectations have room to grow, while still allowing us to deal honestly with whatever life brings.

Optimism Isn't Denial

This distinction matters. There has been considerable pushback against what is sometimes called toxic positivity, and rightly so. Telling someone who is genuinely hurting to “look on the bright side” can be dismissive. Pretending to ourselves that everything is fine when it isn't can prevent us from dealing with something that genuinely needs our attention.

Healthy optimism doesn't require us to deny reality. It can acknowledge: This is difficult. This is real. And I still believe something better is possible. That is a very different kind of positive thinking.

Overcoming the Blues + Developing Resilience — Limited-Time Special Offer

For a limited time, the complete Overcoming the Blues album is available for:

• $99 — MP3 Download
• $119 — Physical CDs

We're also including Developing Resilience as a free bonus. I particularly like pairing these programs because resilience isn't about never being knocked off balance. It is about developing the inner resources that help us recover, adapt and move forward when life inevitably gives us something difficult to deal with.

Overcoming the Blues supports qualities that can help shift the emotional environment—optimism, connection, joy, enthusiasm, peace and serenity—while Developing Resilience supports our ability to recover when life knocks that environment off balance.

This special offer expires at 11:59 PM Pacific Time on Monday, August 31, 2026. Please explore the Overcoming the Blues album here.

Small Changes Accumulate

Perhaps the most hopeful thing to remember is that we don't necessarily need one enormous transformation.

Sometimes a small change makes the next change a little easier. We notice something good. We reach out to someone. We question an unnecessarily pessimistic thought. We begin looking forward to something again. And little by little, the direction changes.

Thoughts and beliefs are the building blocks of your life. Choose them wisely.

Warmly

Ravinder Taylor

"Since listening to my subliminal recordings, I don't mind going to work anymore. I'm very cheerful and I'm no longer moody. I am also getting so I don't take offense about what others say or do. I am now much happier and at peace."
~ B. D. G.

To explore the research into optimism, the surprising studies involving smiles and longevity, and the difference between genuine optimism and toxic positivity, please read the complete newsletter, “What Are You Unknowingly Creating for Yourself?”